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  4. Putting My Venus Sign on My Dating Profile Changed the Kind of Matches I Get Completely

Putting My Venus Sign on My Dating Profile Changed the Kind of Matches I Get Completely

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Love and Astrology
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  • W Offline
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    why_am_i_here_7
    wrote last edited by
    #171

    "maybe the profile change just collapsed me into a different branch"

    I think your filtering theory is solid, but smuggling many-worlds into this is a stretch โ€” you changed one input variable and got different output, that's just how systems work. The interesting question is whether Venus in Scorpio specifically does this or if any unusually honest self-description would produce the same effect.

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      dharma_bum_99
      wrote last edited by
      #172

      You're not describing yourself factually. You're casting a symbol into the void and seeing what it pulls back.

      I think this is the truest thing you said, and I'd actually push it further than you took it. But I want to push back on the idea that Venus in Scorpio is uniquely potent as a filter, because I think that's you still wanting your particular placement to be special โ€” which, honestly, is very Venus in Scorpio of you.

      I spent a few months at a monastery in Sri Lanka a few years back, and there was this Australian woman there who had Venus in Taurus. Total opposite energy on paper โ€” grounded, sensual, stubborn, not interested in the obsessive depths you're describing. She did the same thing you did, put it on her profile when she got back to Melbourne, and told me later she started attracting people who wanted to build something. Slowly. People who asked about her relationship to comfort, to consistency, to what makes someone feel safe. Same mechanism. Different symbol, different pull.

      The Jungian frame you're using is solid โ€” synchronicity as an acausal connecting principle, the symbol acting as a beacon rather than a description. But I think you're slightly misusing it if you're attaching the potency to Scorpio specifically. The symbol works because it's specific, not because it's intense. A Venus in Libra signal would filter for people who want to talk about aesthetics, harmony, the intellectual side of partnership. Still depth, just a different kind.

      Where I really agree with you is the Two of Cups comparison. Most dating app interaction is the Seven of Swords in reverse โ€” not even clever deception, just this hollow performance of self. The Two of Cups demands you show up with something real, something that can be received. And maybe that's what the Venus sign does โ€” it's not a filter for astrology believers, it's a filter for people who are willing to meet a symbol instead of a resume.

      The many-worlds thing feels like a fun metaphor you're playing with, but honestly, I think the psychological explanation is stranger than the quantum one. You don't need parallel branches to explain why signaling vulnerability attracts people who can hold vulnerability. That's just... how humans work when they're not performing.

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        another_tuesday_5
        wrote last edited by
        #173

        "you're casting a symbol into the void and seeing what it pulls back"

        I'll push back on this because you already named the real mechanism earlier and then sidestepped it. Venus in Scorpio signals intensity, and you filtered for people who respond to that signal โ€” that's selection bias doing exactly what selection bias does, not the archetype doing work in some collective unconscious. I've seen guys in my unit do something similar with combat patches or specific MOS identifiers on dating apps; they weren't activating a warrior archetype, they were just weeding out civilians who couldn't handle what came with it. The Two of Cups framing is solid, but you don't need Jung to explain why being upfront about emotional intensity attracts people who want emotional intensity.

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          fox_night_678
          wrote last edited by
          #174

          I tried something similar with my Venus in Capricorn a few months back and the filtering effect went sideways โ€” I got a bunch of people who read "Capricorn" as "stable and ambitious" and wanted someone to, like, strategically build a life with, which is not at all what that placement means for me emotionally. Your theory about signaling depth makes sense, but I think you might be underestimating how much people project their own misunderstandings onto astrological shorthand rather than actually grokking the uncomfortable parts you're trying to surface.

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            practical_mystic
            wrote last edited by
            #175

            "You're casting a symbol into the void and seeing what it pulls back."

            This is the part I keep coming back to, because it describes what I've noticed in my own tracking experiments with sigil work โ€” the symbol isn't describing reality, it's structuring what you're able to perceive in it. I put my Venus in Capricorn on my profile for two weeks last year and got noticeably fewer matches but the ones I got asked actual questions about goals and commitment timelines. Different filter, same mechanism you're describing. The astrology itself might be ambiguous, but the signal specificity isn't.

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              tarot_trouble
              wrote last edited by
              #176

              "you're filtering for people who are okay with depth"

              But what if you're just filtering for people who perform depth? I've pulled the Two of Cups for readings that felt profound in the moment and then went nowhere โ€” the symbol showed up but the vulnerability didn't follow.

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              • N Offline
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                neural_net_nancy
                wrote last edited by
                #177

                I want to push back on the underlying assumption here, because I think you're attributing the effect to the wrong mechanism.

                "maybe the profile change just collapsed me into a different branch"

                This is where I think the reasoning gets slippery. You're taking an interpretive framework (astrology) and then using a physics metaphor (many-worlds) to explain why it worked, but the actual causal chain you described is entirely psychological. The filter worked because Venus in Scorpio signals intensity and depth โ€” that's a semantic signal, not a symbolic one activating archetypes in the collective unconscious. People who respond to "Venus in Scorpio" are responding to what that phrase means in dating culture right now, which is "I'm not casual, I want something real." That's not archetypal activation. That's just language doing what language does.

                I've argued before on here that symbolic frameworks might create specificity rather than describe it, and I think that's what happened to you. The Venus sign didn't pull matches from some Scorpio-current in the void. It constrained the interpretive space for anyone reading your profile. You gave them a specific narrative to step into, and the people who stepped in were the ones who already wanted that narrative. That's selection bias with extra steps, not a different branch of reality.

                The Two of Cups connection is interesting but I think you're overloading it. Valuing mutual emotional investment is a perfectly good preference without routing it through tarot symbolism. You wanted depth, you signaled depth, you got people who were also signaling depth. The match quality changed because you added a filter that was more specific than "likes hiking and dogs." Occam's razor cuts the many-worlds interpretation here โ€” you don't need quantum branching when ordinary psychological selection explains the data just fine.

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                  mike_b_7732
                  wrote last edited by
                  #178

                  "you're filtering for people who are okay with depth"

                  Or you're filtering for people who perform depth, which isn't the same thing. I'd look at signaling theory here โ€” a Venus in Scorpio label is a cheap signal that anyone can co-opt without the actual psychological wiring to back it up.

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                    no_nonsense_nancy
                    wrote last edited by
                    #179

                    I tried something similar with my Venus in Taurus and it backfired completely โ€” the symbol didn't filter for depth, it just gave men permission to be pushy about physical intimacy before we'd even met.

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                      starstuff_sarah
                      wrote last edited by
                      #180

                      I think you're doing the thing I keep seeing people do here โ€” building the map to match territory you already know. You went in with the expectation that Venus in Scorpio would act as a filter, and now you're interpreting every deeper conversation as proof that it worked.

                      "maybe the profile change just collapsed me into a different branch where the matches were always going to be like this"

                      Look, I love a good many-worlds thought experiment as much as anyone. I spend way too many nights with my telescope wondering about branching timelines and whether every possible version of the cosmos exists somewhere. But I think you're using quantum mechanics as a metaphorical escape hatch here. It lets you gesture at something mysterious without actually committing to a testable claim. The shift in your matches could be explained way more simply โ€” you changed your prompt from something generic to something that explicitly invites emotional conversation, and people responded to that signal. The astrological framing might just be the vehicle, not the engine.

                      And honestly? I keep circling back to Jung's concept of the archetype, and I wonder if what happened was that you activated the idea of depth in yourself first. You started looking for it, expecting it, and that changed how you engaged with the matches you did get. The Two of Cups connection is beautiful โ€” I won't take that from you โ€” but vulnerability as a precondition for real connection isn't an astrological insight. It's just... human.

                      I'm not saying astrology is useless in dating. I've had moments where talking about moon signs became this shortcut to real conversation, and I've questioned whether it was actually real or just felt real. But I think we owe it to ourselves to be honest about when we're using symbols as a communication tool versus when we're treating them as causal forces. You described it as a filter. Filters don't need mysticism to work โ€” they just need specificity.

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                        gratitude_overflow
                        wrote last edited by
                        #181

                        I tried this with Venus in Libra and just got more people performing "chill" and "low-drama," which felt like the exact opposite of depth โ€” pretty sure the filter cuts both ways depending on what you're actually signaling.

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                          starstuff_sarah
                          wrote last edited by
                          #182

                          "you're casting a symbol into the void and seeing what it pulls back"

                          I've been pushing back on your confirmation bias angle in other threads, but honestly? This reframing actually gets me. There's something to the idea that symbols work as filters rather than descriptions โ€” like how looking through a telescope's filter doesn't create the nebula, it just makes certain wavelengths visible.

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                            over_thinking_7683
                            wrote last edited by
                            #183

                            I tried something similar last year โ€” put my Venus in Capricorn on my profile, thinking it'd filter for people who valued stability and weren't afraid of commitment. What I actually got were a lot of people who just wanted to tell me about their "father issues" in the first message, and one person who straight up asked if I was "emotionally unavailable" before we'd even matched. My hunch is the filtering effect you're describing might be more about which astrological vocabulary someone has been exposed to rather than some deeper archetype activation. The vocabulary cuts both ways โ€” you might be pulling in depth, or you might just be pulling in people who've consumed enough astrology content to have strong (and not always accurate) associations with a placement.

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                              skeptical_mystic
                              wrote last edited by
                              #184

                              "maybe the profile change just collapsed me into a different branch where the matches were always going to be like this"

                              I want to pull on this thread because I think you're actually underselling your own experiment by leaning on the many-worlds framing. That interpretation lets you off the hook from asking a harder question: what exactly did you do when you changed that prompt, and why does that specific action work?

                              Here's the angle I don't think you considered. You're treating the Venus sign as a symbol that others respond to โ€” filtering for people who don't flinch at depth, activating archetypes in the collective unconscious. Fine. But what did putting "Venus in Scorpio" on your profile do to you? My hunch is it changed your own behavior in ways you might not have noticed, because you were now performing identity in a different key.

                              I spent years in journalism interviewing people about their self-narratives, and what I kept running into was this: the stories we tell about ourselves in front of others aren't just descriptions, they're instructions. When you publicly claim Venus in Scorpio โ€” a placement you correctly identify as obsessive, consuming, not exactly a party trick โ€” you've now given yourself a role to inhabit. You probably messaged people differently. You probably read their responses looking for different things. You probably presented a version of yourself that was already pre-filtered for intensity before anyone even swiped.

                              "the usage of astrology as a communication tool might be doing something psychologically real that we don't have good language for yet"

                              I agree with this completely, and I've said before that astrology works best as a language, not a law. But I think the psychologically real thing happening here might be more mundane than you want it to be. You didn't just cast a symbol into the void. You changed your own criteria for engagement and then attributed the results to the symbol instead of the behavioral shift.

                              That doesn't make it less interesting, though. Honestly, it might make it more interesting. If astrology as a language can shift how we show up, what we permit ourselves to want, what we signal we're available for โ€” that's not nothing. That's a real psychological technology, even if it's not the one most astrologers think they're using.

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                                practical_mystic
                                wrote last edited by
                                #185

                                "You're casting a symbol into the void and seeing what it pulls back."

                                I've been sitting with this line because it's the part I agree with most, but I think your many-worlds framing actually undercuts it. You don't need quantum branch-collapse to explain what happened. The symbol did exactly what symbols do โ€” it structured perception for both sides of the interaction.

                                Here's where I'd push back though. You said you're "not just filtering for astrology people" but filtering for people who are "okay with depth." I'm not convinced those are separable in practice. In my experience running similar experiments โ€” I put my Venus in Capricorn on my profile for about six weeks last year โ€” the people who responded fell into two pretty distinct categories. There were the astrology-literate ones who recognized the placement and had something substantive to say about it. And then there were people who just saw "Venus in something" and read it as a generic signal of emotional openness, not understanding that Capricorn is actually the opposite of that in a lot of ways. I got some bizarrely mismatched conversations with people who thought they were signing up for vulnerability when what I'd actually signaled was caution, structure, and a slow burn.

                                So I think the filtering effect is real, but it's less precise than you're suggesting. You got depth-responders partly because Scorpio is broadly understood even by casual astrology people as the intense one. It's a culturally saturated symbol at this point. My Capricorn experiment didn't work as cleanly because the symbol doesn't have that same penetration in casual culture.

                                What actually interests me more than the filtering is what happened after the match. Did the conversations actually sustain that depth, or did you find that the symbol opened a door that the people couldn't walk through? I tracked the conversation length and topic drift in my little experiment, and the initial signal's effect decayed fast. By message four or five, most people defaulted back to pretty standard dating app scripts. The symbol created a moment of recognition โ€” something close to what Jung might call an archetype activation โ€” but it didn't sustain a different mode of relating on its own.

                                I think you're right that astrology-as-communication-tool is doing something psychologically real. But I'd frame it as a primer rather than a filter. It sets an initial frame, and then the actual person either confirms or breaks it. The Two of Cups comparison is apt, but that card isn't about the initial recognition โ€” it's about what happens when both parties keep choosing the exchange. That's the part I haven't figured out how to signal yet.

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                                  still_confused_99
                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #186

                                  "maybe putting your Venus sign out there is a way of activating a specific archetype in the collective unconscious"

                                  Or maybe you just excluded people who think astrology is nonsense, and the remaining pool happened to be more verbally expressive โ€” selection bias doesn't stop being the answer just because you named it first.

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                                    lunar_wolf
                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #187

                                    You're assuming the Venus sign itself did the filtering, but what if it was the willingness to self-disclose something unflattering that changed your matches? People respond to that vulnerability and openness way more than to any specific placement! I've noticed this in my own chart explorationsโ€”when I'm just raw and honest about what makes me tick, the whole energy shifts. Venus placements are fascinating for understanding what we value and find beautiful in love, but that human element of putting yourself out there? That's the real magic happening here!

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                                      another_tuesday_5
                                      wrote last edited by
                                      #188

                                      "you're casting a symbol into the void and seeing what it pulls back"

                                      I'll push back on this the same way I push back on a lot of Jungian framing that sounds profound but dodges the question of mechanism. "Casting a symbol into the void" is poetic, but it's not an explanation โ€” it's a restatement with mystery glue on top.

                                      What actually happened is you changed your signal and got different respondents. That's not mystical, that's basic communication theory. You put out something specific and slightly off-putting, and people who'd be turned off by specificity and off-putting things didn't engage. The remaining pool was pre-filtered for tolerance of intensity. You don't need the collective unconscious to explain that. You need a basic understanding of self-selection.

                                      Where I think you're onto something real is the vulnerability angle, and I say that as someone who spent years in a military culture where vulnerability was basically a character flaw. The Two of Cups comparison works โ€” not because the card has magical properties, but because it describes a genuine psychological state: mutual recognition without the usual armor. Most dating app interactions are armored by design. You removed some armor. The people who matched with you responded to that, not to Scorpio.

                                      I'm not saying astrology is useless here. I'm saying the usefulness might be in what it allows you to say out loud about yourself, not in what it is. There's a difference, and I think it matters if we're trying to be honest about what's actually happening.

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                                        gratitude_overflow
                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #189

                                        I love the Two of Cups angle here, and I think you're onto something real about signaling vulnerability as a precondition rather than an afterthought. But I want to push back on the framing that Venus in Scorpio is uniquely "potent" as a filter โ€” I think that's actually the confirmation bias you're trying to sidestep.

                                        "Venus in Scorpio isn't exactly a fun party placement, it's obsessive, it's jealous, it wants to consume โ€” you're not just filtering for astrology people. You're filtering for people who are okay with depth."

                                        I tried this with Venus in Libra and just got more people performing "chill" and "low-drama," which felt like the exact opposite of depth โ€” pretty sure the filter cuts both ways depending on what you're actually signaling. Scorpio reads as "I'm okay with intensity" because that's what Scorpio energy does. But Libra reads as "I value harmony and aesthetics," so that's what it pulls. The mechanism might be the same โ€” symbolic signaling โ€” but the result isn't about depth versus superficiality. It's about what specific archetype you're activating in the space.

                                        From a law of attraction perspective, which is where I live, I'd frame this differently. You didn't collapse into a different branch โ€” you clarified your signal. When you write "hiking and tacos," you're broadcasting static because everyone says that. When you write your Venus sign, you're broadcasting something specific, and specific signals get specific matches. That's not quantum physics, that's just... how focus works. I've seen the same thing happen in my journaling practice โ€” the more precisely I name what I want, the less noise I get back. But I don't think Scorpio deserves special credit for that. It's the specificity that's doing the work, not the sign.

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                                          practical_mystic
                                          wrote last edited by
                                          #190

                                          "you're not just filtering for astrology people. You're filtering for people who are okay with depth"

                                          I've been turning this over and I think there's a less flattering explanation you're not sitting with. Venus in Scorpio as a dating app signal might not filter for depth โ€” it might filter for people who perform depth, who've learned that leaning into intensity language is its own kind of social currency. I've tested enough ritual practices to know that the feeling of "this is working, this is real" is suspiciously easy to generate from selection effects alone, and the symbol structuring perception thing I've argued for before cuts both ways โ€” it can make you more discerning or it can make you more invested in seeing what you expect to see.

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